On earth as it is in Heaven
I met an old sports camp friend at the zoo yesterday, and we really had the best time. It had been a while since we had been to the Dallas Zoo, so it was really nice of Jess to invite us and show us around. As we were walking, I felt such gratitude in my heart. I was so thankful for this friendship. It had been over four years since we had seen each other, and it was just easy. Do you have friendships like that? Where you feel like no matter how much time you spend apart, it picks up easily? It was just fun.
I felt thankful for my babies. Thankful that we had this opportunity to be at the zoo, pretty close to where we live. I was amazed at all the animals and habitats that God creates for them. I love the zoo, because I always notice something that I never had before. God is so creative. So good. I was so overwhelmed with joy.
And then I got the text message.
The text message that I had been fearing and praying against for weeks.
One of my sweet friends had lost her baby. This is miscarriage number 4. My heart sank. Devastation. Frustration. Confusion. So many emotions. My mood and thoughts instantly shifted.
All of those things that I just mentioned were still present in my life. Like literally still present in my eyesight, but I lost sight of it. All of the thankfulness was completely gone.
Fast forward to this morning. I went to the gym. When I walked in, I headed straight towards the treadmill, what I always do. I always pick one that is close to a TV that is not showing ESPN. I think it was like the CBS morning show or something. About a minute into my walk, they begin to show footage from Syria. Graphic, painful, disturbing images. I would look for a second or two and then would have to turn away. Pictures of children being rushed into medical vehicles. Bodies in body bags. And an image I wish that I never saw but I pray that I never forget. A man holding his 9 month old twins who lost their lives during the attack.
I couldn't. I couldn't watch anymore. My heart couldn't take it. I had to move to a treadmill that literally looks at a pole. I kept thinking about my babies and what I would feel if what that man was experiencing was my reality.
I'm sure I looked like an idiot going through a 30 yr old crisis, but I just cried my whole run.
So much pain in this world. So much undeserved pain.
I thought about my friend and the unbearable heartbreak she and her husband are feeling. I thought about that man on TV holding his dead babies and not wanting to let them go.
I had planned on listening to a TED Talk during my run, but I couldn't turn off the Bethel Worship Pandora station. God kept giving me song after song that spoke truth, hope, and life over me. I couldn't deny that He was comforting my sorrow.
Lyrics like...
"I'm not afraid. Show me your glory."
"What a powerful name it is, the name of Jesus"
"With everything I've got, my heart will sing how I love you"
"Come to the River. Come receive."
"Though the earth gives way, the mountains move into the sea. The nations rage, I know my God is in control."
But one that is playing over and over in my head...
"Let Heaven come to earth as it is in Heaven."
This world is not Heaven. Nothing like it. We should never believe for a second that it is.
I don't believe God caused my friend to miscarry. I don't believe God caused the attacks in Syria.
I do believe we live in a sinful world, and that Satan has power here. I don't like that.
I wish this were Heaven, because none of this would have happened. God's will and power would be what we see all the time, but it's not. And it sucks.
Today I am praying for my friend, and I am praying for the people in Syria because they are on my heart.
I am praying that God would show me His glory. That I would find supreme power in His name. That with my entire being, I would sing His praises. That I would go to Him and that He would be my source. That even though there is chaos all around me, He is still in control.
And Lord Jesus, come. Please. Let heaven come down.
I felt thankful for my babies. Thankful that we had this opportunity to be at the zoo, pretty close to where we live. I was amazed at all the animals and habitats that God creates for them. I love the zoo, because I always notice something that I never had before. God is so creative. So good. I was so overwhelmed with joy.
And then I got the text message.
The text message that I had been fearing and praying against for weeks.
One of my sweet friends had lost her baby. This is miscarriage number 4. My heart sank. Devastation. Frustration. Confusion. So many emotions. My mood and thoughts instantly shifted.
All of those things that I just mentioned were still present in my life. Like literally still present in my eyesight, but I lost sight of it. All of the thankfulness was completely gone.
Fast forward to this morning. I went to the gym. When I walked in, I headed straight towards the treadmill, what I always do. I always pick one that is close to a TV that is not showing ESPN. I think it was like the CBS morning show or something. About a minute into my walk, they begin to show footage from Syria. Graphic, painful, disturbing images. I would look for a second or two and then would have to turn away. Pictures of children being rushed into medical vehicles. Bodies in body bags. And an image I wish that I never saw but I pray that I never forget. A man holding his 9 month old twins who lost their lives during the attack.
I couldn't. I couldn't watch anymore. My heart couldn't take it. I had to move to a treadmill that literally looks at a pole. I kept thinking about my babies and what I would feel if what that man was experiencing was my reality.
I'm sure I looked like an idiot going through a 30 yr old crisis, but I just cried my whole run.
So much pain in this world. So much undeserved pain.
I thought about my friend and the unbearable heartbreak she and her husband are feeling. I thought about that man on TV holding his dead babies and not wanting to let them go.
I had planned on listening to a TED Talk during my run, but I couldn't turn off the Bethel Worship Pandora station. God kept giving me song after song that spoke truth, hope, and life over me. I couldn't deny that He was comforting my sorrow.
Lyrics like...
"I'm not afraid. Show me your glory."
"What a powerful name it is, the name of Jesus"
"With everything I've got, my heart will sing how I love you"
"Come to the River. Come receive."
"Though the earth gives way, the mountains move into the sea. The nations rage, I know my God is in control."
But one that is playing over and over in my head...
"Let Heaven come to earth as it is in Heaven."
This world is not Heaven. Nothing like it. We should never believe for a second that it is.
I don't believe God caused my friend to miscarry. I don't believe God caused the attacks in Syria.
I do believe we live in a sinful world, and that Satan has power here. I don't like that.
I wish this were Heaven, because none of this would have happened. God's will and power would be what we see all the time, but it's not. And it sucks.
Today I am praying for my friend, and I am praying for the people in Syria because they are on my heart.
I am praying that God would show me His glory. That I would find supreme power in His name. That with my entire being, I would sing His praises. That I would go to Him and that He would be my source. That even though there is chaos all around me, He is still in control.
And Lord Jesus, come. Please. Let heaven come down.
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